I have pee

RestRoomsAmericans know there are different times for saying “I gotta pee,” “I’m going to use the restroom,” “I need to wee wee,” or “May I be excused?”

I know that I can tell my friends, “I gotta pee, I’ll be right back,” but I wouldn’t tell a first date “I’m gonna drain my lizard.”

Israelis have funny ways for saying “I gotta pee.” The first time I heard this, I was on a date. We were having a great time hanging out, and this gorgeous Israeli girl tells me …

יש לי פיפי –

Huh?!? You got what? I didn’t know how to respond to that. Apperently that’s how you say “I gotta pee” in Hebrew… “I have pee.” Today I know nothing else is approprate to say in Hebrew. If you say אני הולך לשרותים … “I’m going to the restroom,” you sound like a 4 year old to Israelis. The only appropriate way to say it in Hebrew is “Yesh Li Peepee.”

So all you Americakim out there, next time you need to pee, bite down hard on your tongue to keep from cracking up … and tell your Israeli friend … יש לי פיפי

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8 Responses to I have pee

  1. It’s perfectly appropriate, even colloquially, to say, אני חייב להשתין (I have to pee).

  2. Maya says:

    Lets not forget how sneeze is pronounced: “up-chee”. Yep, the word for sneeze is a combo of what a sneeze actually sounds like and the word “sneeze”. What will be next? The word for “burp” being what a burp actually sounds like?! Greps!

  3. Ethan says:

    You can say I need to be excused. it’s the polite way. A girl saying I have peepee is trying to be cute in a 4 year old kind of way. it’s one of those things that girls can get away with, that guys can’t.

    and regarding the fact a sneeze is referred to as an Apchee (it has a name: עיטוש, as in אני עומד להתעטש), it’s one of many of it’s kind: words that sound like what they are are known as Onomatopoeia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Onomatopoeia). these are very common in Hebrew. And apparently. “In Turkish, hapşurmak is the verb for to sneeze, based on the sound “hapshoo” made by a person who sneezes.”

    BTW, ever notice how Burp sounds like itself? In fact, Sneeze also does. and Cough, too.

  4. israluv says:

    lol- it is almost as funny as the “gamarti vs. Siyamit” word usage.

    btw- i burst out laughing when i saw the name for the author of this post… does that mean you got some even though she had to go pipi?

  5. Kibalti Fak says:

    Yeah, that’s a cruel trick ulpan instructors play on Americans. They teach us that gamarti means I finished, when it really means … I got off.

    There is a funny story behind Kibalti Fak. Read the post here …

    http://zabaj.com/2007/02/06/received-a-fck-%d7%a7%d7%91%d7%9c%d7%aa%d7%99-%d7%a4%d7%90%d7%a7/

  6. israluv says:

    i used to use the word gamarti just to make my dinner companions or the wait staff look twice at me…. b/c i used it in my israeli accent and they usually all looked at me and couldnt figur out why an Israeli used that word and not seyamit . brought a smile to lips every time…..

  7. Warren says:

    I agree with Ethan, “יש לי פיפי” sounds like a four year old, too. And why should anyone be interested in which sort of use one is planning to make of the bathroom? Is there a Hebrew acronym for TMI?

    Greps is Yiddish, by the way.

  8. Yossele says:

    I was told to use the phrase;
    ‘הלכתי להתפנות’ which literally means that “I went to evacuate” which either sounds far too graphic for my poor British sensibilities or sounds like war has been announced and I need a polite way to describe my cowardice. I think we should import a part of British culture and have many euphamisms for this activity (its like Inuits and snow), this is just an abbreviated in list;
    I’m going to spend a penny
    I’m going to the loo / khazi / little boy (or girls room)’s room/ the liverpool
    I’m going to powder my nose
    I’m going to ‘freshen up’.
    Actually being direct may have its advantages.

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