For the secular folks in Israel there isn’t really a big focus on saying “happy new year” these days. Instead, they prefer wishing each other that they go conduct sexual intercourse with themselves.
Today is Zabaj’s most popular day ever! Its too bad we haven’t updated the blog in a while (silly Americans with their jobs, no time to sit around eating humus and smelling like Zatar).
We expect this to get us some heat from Israelis who don’t like admitting what a funny place they live in. For them, allow us to clarify that we’ve all chosen to live here, enjoy our lives here and actually work actively to bring others here. We’re not just standing on the sidelines making fun of the place. The stuff we’ve written about Israelis, Israeli culture and the life here in general is all done out of love.
For those new to the blog, allow us to highlight a few of our favorite postings:
For those of you who knew Jacob’s blog back in ‘aught 5, this will be a blast from the (dorky) past. Basically, I snuck a digital recorder into my god-awful truck driving course in the army. Hillarity ensued. Made this song:
And now the story behind it… Read the rest of this entry »
To hitch a ride – “take a tremp”
Subaru (as in the car) – soo-BA-roo
Video – veed-yo
Balloon – bah-lon
Listen – lees-Ten
Shit – sheet
Sheet – sheet
…also, as we saw in part 1, Israelis love pronouncing the silent letters in words (first it was the middle “L” in lincoln and now it is the “T” in listen)
Remember “your momma” jokes? These are some that Israelis grew up on …
אמא שלך בגבס – your momma’s in a cast
אמא שלך בגהה – your momma’s in Geha (hospital for the insane)
This one’s my favorite …
אמא שלך בקונטרה בס – your momma’s in a double bass (the musical instrument)
I won’t get into the various stigmas or classifications done here in Israel according to the car you drive. That is a completely separate Zabaj post. However, on top of having to deal with that, since I drive a Mitsubishi (מיצובישי) I also have to hear it mispronounced and mis-spelled a lot, including at the official Mitsubishi garage I take my car to be fixed at.
The most popular is Mitsibushi/מיציבושי (mee-tsee-boo-shee)
Followed by Mitsubushi/מיצובושי (mee-tsoo-boo-shee)
This is so widespread that even in the official Israel Trade & Commerce publications they seem to be making these mistakes, writing “Mitsibushi” on their English-language list of Australian car manufacturers.
Is it cuz they associate it with Japan and the word sushi?