Embarassing

July 29, 2009

A bar in Tel Aviv is not allowing Israeli soldiers to enter. Read the article in the Jerusalem Post. The next step will a bar in Israel that doesn’t allow Jews.


Thanks for the Advice

December 26, 2007

 ist2_766259_trashy_trailer2.jpg

Y’ever notice how (who am I, Andy Rooney here?) Israelis tend to answer requests for advice with absolutely ridiculous non-sequitur suggestions?  It’s as if they decide to forget everything they know about the person and his situation and jump straight to advice based on who they are and what situation they’re in?  Okay, even *I’m* not following at this point, so, an example:

Jook: I’m looking to rent a house, somewhere in Hod HaSharon, my budget is approx. $1000/mo, I’m looking for something small but nice, maybe around 150 square meters…

Israeli Advice Giver: Why don’t you rent a trailer in somebody’s backyard?

Yeah.  So, for those that don’t think this is ridiculous, let me do a little recreation here, but let’s pretend I want an iPod instead of a house:

Jook: I want that new 16 gig iPod touch, it’s really cool.

Israeli Advice Giver: Why don’t you make a guitar out of a 1 x 4, rubber bands, and thumbtacks?

I mean, really? A trailer.  And this suggestion came from several people. Who am I,  Jethro from The Beverly Hillbillies?  No, I’m a 27-year old bachelor internet executive who’s gonna go live in a trailer.  Thanks, man.  I’m not looking for professional advice here, but is it too much to ask that they have the attention span to pay attention to the part where I describe what I’m looking for?  Just askin’ if you heard anything ’bout a house for rent, that’s all…Not that the trailer thing is so frowned upon around here, apparently.  Successful, self-sufficient salaried guys are going out and renting trailers.  I even have a friend whose friend built a tent in his parents’ backyard (and no he wasn’t Billy Madison) What’s with the infantilism?  Maybe it’s cultural (and maybe I’m imposing my values a little bit here), but does it seem to anyone else that Israeli men sometimes live in a suspended state of adolescence until they get married?  “Aw man, that Jook, king in the castle, with his SOLID WALLS and all…”

Maybe I should just go live in a treehouse for chrissake and instead of a phone, I’ll bring back the Campbell’s soup cans with the fishing wire between them and communicate that way.  Then I’ll put up a sign that says “NO GIRLZ ALLOWD” until the tomboy down the street works her way into my heart and I experience my first tryst with summertime love and permaturely ejaculate into my light blue Ocean Pacific shorts that one time in my uncle’s basement in 1991.  Huh? Right. House.

Lemme know if anyone hears of anything for rent!


Chinese food?

September 4, 2007

Sweet and sour chickenSo I was eating lunch today…a plate of Chinese food. Or “Chinese food” as I like to call it in Israel. I guess Chinese food in America is also pretty far from real Chinese cuisine but at least it tastes good.

Anyway, I was eating like a sweet and sour chicken kind of thing…you know, the one with pineapples. This one had pineapples and peppers and onions and a sweet-ish sauce and I bit into it and tasted something bitter. I looked down on my plate and saw that the dish included sliced pickles.

Kid you not.

Pickles in the sweet and sour chicken.

Only in Israel…we love us some pickles over here!


Happy New Year

September 3, 2007

From Taglit-birthright israel and Rosh Hashanah Girl:


Gal-gal-gal-galatz!

August 29, 2007

Don’t you get bored of hearing the same songs over and over again on the radio? Well one thing that makes Israel fun is the complete randomness of the radio stations.

Galgalatz

Only in Israel can you listen to Galgalatz and within 10 minutes, hear Robbie Williams followed immediately by The BeatlesRihanna (ella ella ay ay ay)…and concluding with Dana International before the commercial.

You just never know what’s gonna come on next!

Click the logo for a live broadcast and hear it for yourself…


Look out for falling people

May 8, 2007

Danger, if you walk past this sign, falling people could land on you.

As the great El Guapo once said … “Are Amigos fall from the sky?”

Look out for falling people


Memorial Day

April 23, 2007

During the Lebanon war, I visited some injured soldiers in hospitals across Israel.  This video shows the stories of some really amazing heroes.

All the soldiers that sacrificed themselves to defend Israel should always be remembered.